SCHNODDRIG KERL

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Schnoddrig Kerl

Why would such a sweet looking little elf be named Schnoddrig Kerl?

One can hardly understand it . . . until Schnoddrig opens his mouth! What issues forth is the most brash and inappropriate verbage one can imagine.

Looks do not always indicate the personality and Schnoddrig certainly verifies this thought. But like a few sweet and cute looking people, this elf gets by with brash talk and thoughtless comments.

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FIX-IT ELF

THE FIX-IT ELF

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The North Pole of all places needs a good Fix-It Elf and this one fills the bill.

He has a good array of tools and knows how to use them, plus he has the uncanning ability of a good fix=it man . . or elf . . to understand how things work. He also has a sixth sense that tells him what is wrong and how to fix it.

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MY HUSBAND, THE WOODCARVER

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Millard was honored to have a national woodcarving magazine
"Woodcarving Illustrated" ask him to write an article for their magazine.

His article came out in their Holiday Edition a couple of weeks ago.
What an exciting time for both of us.



← This is the cover of the magazine
as it was published.

This was one of the

runner up covers →

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That happens to be a picture of Millard's Santa

that was featured in his story on page 72 - 77.

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Millard is a member of the discussion board of the "Wood Carving Illustrated."

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I am a member of a local Emporia web site "Flyover People."

It is an amazing web site about Kansas.

http://www.flyoverpeople.net/news/
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Cheryl (the administrator of Flyover People) posted a story about Millard.
http://www.flyoverpeople.net/news/2010/11/15/millard-hits-the-big-time/
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The woodcarving slide show that Cheryl mentions in her story was produced by her husband, Dave. He did such a professional presentation.
http://www.prairiepathways.com/galleries/woodcarver/woodcarver.html
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Our local Emporia Gazette featured Millard in this week ends paper - on the front page. I do not have a link to the front page with the pictures - only a link to the article.
http://www.emporiagazette.com/news/2010/nov/27/local-woodcarvers-ornament-featured-magazine/
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If you are at a place that sells the "Woodcarving Illustrated", I hope you will have a chance to see and read the article. I don't think it is sold in Wal-Mart - usually in bookstores.
Our local bookstore "Town Crier Book Store" and Graves Drug Store/Pharmacy sells the magazine.
However, it should be in most book stores around the U.S. http://www.towncrierbookstore.com/
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Millard's Elves - he was consigned to carve 45 elves this year - are on this blog and will be on his web site when his wife updates it.☺
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Millard also was in an Emporia Gazette Feature Story in 2006.
http://www.emporiagazette.com/news/2006/dec/09/coaxed_wood/

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CAMBIADOR, THE BULB CHANGER

Cambiador, the Bulb Changer
























Where IS this Elf when we need him?
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THE POPCORN STRINGER

THE POPCORN STRINGER

At Santa's North Pole Elf compound, and among all elves of the world, all honest work is celebrated and found honorable no matter how menial or rooted in simplicity it is. The little Popcorn Stringer is one such elf that is honored every year by Santa. He is the only elf that is allowed to travel the lightening speed trip around the world with Santa each Christmas Eve night and Christmas morning.

Santa not only enjoys his company, but on behalf of all those that have simple jobs, Santa honors the little Popcorn Stringer.

Believe it or not, there are still places on earth where Christmas is not celebrated until Christmas morning after a period of prayer, fasting and preparation to receive the Christ, whether as a holy infant or a King coming in glory. In those special places the celebration of Christmas often is done very frugally and accompanied with many prayers.

The Christmas tree in those homes are left undecorated until the children, upon returning home from church, to their wonder find it decorated with oranges and strings of popcorn.

Santa takes the little Popcorn Stringer to attend to every detail of decorating these special homes where the true spirit of Christmas resides.

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THE ATHLETIC ELF

THE ATHLETIC ELF

Who is better for Santa to put in charge of all athletic equipment than and Elf that was a former Elf Olympics Athlete?

He sees that all the athletic equipment Santa delivers on Christmas morning is top notch. He also keeps all the elves up to date on the latest happenings in the world of elf sports while they are busily working on toys.

PETER PAN CHIEF TOY BUILDER

Chief Toy Maker

Story by

Linda James Ledford

Linda is the mother of Cindy (James) Reiher who wrote the story for Redford

which is a few elves below.

"Peter Pan Chief Toy Builder Elf applied with Santa for a job as he found himself less popular and demanded by his followers. Like so many in show business his fame was soon less vivid and the limelight focused on another. Still determined to never grow up he convinced Santa he was the best for this important post. He has produced the long traditional dolls, trains, wagons and farm sets as well as all the new electronic gadgetry expected by today's children."
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Thank You Linda for this neat story.

ELF BOY

ELF BOY

This happy pre-pubescent Elf Boy has just celebrated his thirty-fourth birthday. A friend of the Mama Doll Foreman, this Elf Boy and his friend roams the elf colony at the North Pole in the tradition of Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer.

Since the normal life span of an elf is near 250 years, the Elf Boy's boyhood lasts until they are about 40 years old.

Most elves marry at about 60 years of age.

CONSTABLE ELF

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CONSTABLE ELF

There is only one Constable Elf among the population of elves. He is trained directly by the Elf King himself.
Seldom does any disagreement or conflict arise among the elves, so there is only need for one Constable Elf. He travels throughout the world mediating any situations calling for his help.
He stops by the North Pole several times each century.

BOLLACKER - THE CHRISTMAS TREE PRUNER

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BOLLACKER

THE CHRISTMAS TREE PRUNER

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This elf prunes and cares for all Christmas trees.
The Christmas Tree Pruner and his work force have been sighted by Christmas Tree Farmers many times. Just ask them.

ELF KING

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ELF KING

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In an agreement with the Elf King, the elves have been "allowed" to work in Santa's Workshop. When it comes to anything that is connected with producing toys, Santa is boss. However, all other questions about how the elves live and deal with one another are handled by the Elf King.
All the elves throughout the world answer to him . . . even the prairie elves that inhabit the remaining tracts of Tall Grass Prairie, answer to the Elf King.

REDFORD

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A SPECIAL THANK YOUto

CINDY (JAMES) REIHER

Cindy named this elf for us and penned the story. She is formerly from Elkhart, KS (Yarbrough area)

"Redford is a mischievous but kind elf. He finds enjoyment in completing random acts of kindness and usually he is able to do his work anonymously. Redford has been caught in the act of kindness and his face reflects the fact that he is surprised that he has been discovered, yet pleased that his work has been noticed and appreciated."
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Thank You Cindy. This is so fitting for this elf.

THE CANDY CANE BENDER

THE CANDY CANE BENDER

The Candy Cane Bender was an elf that just didn't fit in anywhere. He seemed to be unable to do anything right . . . . until one day a frustrated fellow worker said, "Use your head!" He did and the Candy Cane Bender found his niche.

He has been busy ever since . . . . "Using His Head!"

THE BABY SPIT-UP FOREMAN

THE BABY SPIT-UP FOREMAN

One almost has to feel sorry for the Baby Spit-Up Foreman. He had envisioned producing a baby doll that little girls could daintily dab at the sweet dollies mouth, practicing for the day they would tenderly wipe a real baby's mouth as it's little gastric digestive system developed.

It is a crying shame that a grown elf man is reduced to cowering and being completely intimidated by something of his own creation!

The Computer Geek had rigged the dolls to emit a torrent of foul smelling substance at irregular and unexpected times causing all the elves to approach them as one would a bomb that may go off at any second.

Here we have the Baby Spit-Up Foreman approaching a doll in an effort to defuse it before it expels its load of who-knows-what. You can see the tenseness in his face.

THE MAMA DOLL FOREMAN'S GRANDSON

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THE MAMA DOLL FOREMAN'S
GRANDSON






I would like to tell you, faithful blog followers, that Santa's Elves live by a higher standard than their human counter parts, but I can't. They are susceptible to many of the same temptations and failings as humans. They also indulge in family rivalries, creating hurt feelings, secretly finding satisfaction in some others misfortunes and the like.
You all know the Mama Doll's Foreman's "phasing out" of the active toy production scene and he has carried some resentment that has rubbed off on his grandson. This has led to the episode I am going to relate concerning the Mama Doll Foreman's grandson.
As you remember, the Computer Geek Elf introduced a computer program that attempted to fundamentally transform the way that Santa produced his toys. There were other parts to the program that were hidden and were not apparent until the program was fully engaged. The Computer Geek Elf thought that little girls needed more options to operate their "Baby Spit-up Dolls" so he installed four settings on the dolls to make the spit up mechanism operational.
The settings were . . .
#1 - Spit Up.
#2 - A Stronger Spit Up
#3 - More Intense Spit Up, Vomit
And, the most intense setting . . . .
#4 - Projectile Vomit
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This carving of the Mama Doll Foreman's Grandson is of him taking special pleasure in viewing the Baby Spit-Up Foreman taking a full load of setting #4 in the kisser.
No fingers are being pointed, but the kid seems awfully pleased at the exhibition and seems to be saying . . . .
"Hey Gramps, that was for YOU!"

BACCHIE, THE KEEPER OF THE WINE CELLAR

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This elf was inspired by a friend
(Renaissance Cellars Winery, Timothy E. Akers)

because of his invitation to the

Renaissance Cellars Grand Opening

Oct. 29 & Oct. 30 - 2010

518 W Bertrand - Saint Marys, KS

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This elf and Santa have known the secret since the early 1800's when the settlers discovered that wine made from grapes grown on the sunny plains of Kansas is some of the best in the world. To guard their secret, they started the myth that California was the best place to produce wine and they also promoted the truth that Kansas was the wheat capital of the nation.

All this was done so that when Santa delivered presents to Kansas, he could secretly pick up a year's supply of wine that was made from the grapes grown there.

This elf, who's name is Bacchie, is in charge of Santa's wine cellar and he is also trusted to keep the secret that Kansas is the best place to produce wine.

SANTA'S TRAIN SET TRACKMAN ELF

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Train Set Trackman Elf

The Trackman Elf believes a train set is only as good as the track that it runs on. He has pride in his work and wears a piece of train track proudly on his hat.

ELF NURSE

Santa's Elf Nurse

Santa, always being concerned for his elves welfare, has acquired an elf nurse to attend to the elves health case.
The elves think that she is just bee-yoo-tee-ful and visits to the North Pole Infirmary have almost doubled since she came.
Ditsy's headaches and Tubby's tummy aches have particularly came more frequent since her arrival.

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