Tuesday, September 14, 2010

THE IRISH HERITAGE GIFT CONSULTANT ELF

The Irish Heritage Gift consultant Elf







The background of this elf is accurately summed up in this
traditional Irish poem.











The Orange and The Green


Oh, it is the biggest mix up that you have ever seen.
My father, he was Orange and me mother, she was green.

My father was an Ulster man, proud Protestant was he.
My Mother was a Catholic girl, from county Cork was she.
They were married in two churches, lived happily enough,
Until the day that I was born and things got rather tough.

Baptized by Father Riley, I was rushed away by car,
To be made a little Orangeman, my father's shining star.
I was christened "David Anthony," but still, inspite of that,
To me father, I was William, while my mother called me Pat.

With Mother every Sunday, to Mass I'd proudly stroll.
Then after that, the Orange lodge would try to save my soul.
For both sides tried to claim me, but I was smart because
I'd play the flute or play the harp, depending where I was.

Now when I'd sing those rebel songs, much to me mother's joy
Me father would jump up and say, "Look here would you me boy.
That's quite enough of that lot". he'd then toss me a coin

And he'd have me sing the Orange Flute or the Heros of the Boyne.

One day me Ma's relations came round to visit me.
Just as my father's kinfolk were all sitting down to tea.
We tried to smooth things over, but they all began to fight.
And me, being strictly neutral. I bashed everyone in sight.

My parents never could agree about my type of school.
My learning was all done at home, that's why I'm such a fool.
They've both passed on, God rest 'em, but left me caught between
That awful color problem of the Orange and the Green.


After the big fight, the Irish Gift Elf left home and ultimately showed up on Santa's door step at the North Pole. While on the long walk to the North Pole his ears became severely frost bitten. When they were healed, they took on a pointed appearance and he was magically transformed into an elf.

1 comment:

diy said...

I follow all that and while I'm rubbish with the flute I can swager with the best.