THE COMPUTER GEEK ELF

The

Computer

Geek

Elf


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This elf showed up at the North Pole seemingly out of no where.

Although he is not much for looks, he was a smooth talker. Santa was going through a bit of a down turn in the toy and other gift production and the Computer Geek Elf told him (Santa) that he needed some hope and some change. Santa asked him what kind of change and the elf said the he needed to fundamentally change the way he did things around there.

Well, Santa was caught at a weak moment and he agreed to change everything over to a nifty computer program . . . his naughty and nice lists, his toy inventory, reindeer health concerns, sleigh maintenance and everything.

It wasn't long before Santa realized things were getting worse as the elf continued to replace and change much of the ways Santa had done things for many years.

Then just under two months before Christmas one year, Santa decided to put a stop to the elf's radical changes. He succeeded in stopping the elf in his tracks, but the Computer Greek Elf had made just enough changes that in order for Santa to get anything ready for Christmas at all, he would have to keep the elf and some of his changes around for many years.

The Computer Geek Elf was not very popular with the other elves and some even tried to circulate the story that he wasn't really even an elf. But with those big ears, few ever took that story very seriously.

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THE BUTTERNUT PRESERVATION ELF

The Butternut Preservation Elf

The Butternut Preservation Elf works in very close association with the Naughty and Nice list Administrator and the Nice List Recorder to ensure that only the nicest of the nice

woodcarvers and woodworkers get gifts of butternut this year.
This is due to the impending shortage of this wood due to the butternut canker disease that has ravaged trees through out the country.
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Notice that this elf has such large elf ears that he had to cut slits in his hat to wear it comfortably. This he did in resignation after trying to cover them up with hair.

THE IRISH HERITAGE GIFT CONSULTANT ELF

The Irish Heritage Gift consultant Elf







The background of this elf is accurately summed up in this

traditional Irish poem.

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The Orange and The Green


Oh, it is the biggest mix up that you have ever seen.
My father, he was Orange and me mother, she was green.

My father was an Ulster man, proud Protestant was he.
My Mother was a Catholic girl, from county Cork was she.
They were married in two churches, lived happily enough,
Until the day that I was born and things got rather tough.

Baptized by Father Riley, I was rushed away by car,
To be made a little Orangeman, my father's shining star.
I was christened "David Anthony," but still, inspite of that,
To me father, I was William, while my mother called me Pat.

With Mother every Sunday, to Mass I'd proudly stroll.
Then after that, the Orange lodge would try to save my soul.
For both sides tried to claim me, but I was smart because
I'd play the flute or play the harp, depending where I was.

Now when I'd sing those rebel songs, much to me mother's joy
Me father would jump up and say, "Look here would you me boy.
That's quite enough of that lot". he'd then toss me a coin
And he'd have me sing the Orange Flute or the Heros of the Boyne.

One day me Ma's relations came round to visit me.
Just as my father's kinfolk were all sitting down to tea.
We tried to smooth things over, but they all began to fight.
And me, being strictly neutral. I bashed everyone in sight.

My parents never could agree about my type of school.
My learning was all done at home, that's why I'm such a fool.
They've both passed on, God rest 'em, but left me caught between
That awful color problem of the Orange and the Green.

After the big fight, the Irish Gift Elf left home and ultimately showed up on Santa's door step at the North Pole. While on the long walk to the North Pole his ears became severely frost bitten. When they were healed, they took on a pointed appearance and he was magically transformed into an elf.

TUBBY, THE CANDY TASTING ELF

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Tubby, the Candy Tasting Elf
Tubby's job is to taste candy so that nothing comes out of the North Pole short of delicious.
When he applied for a job at Santa's Workshop Santa knew immediately, from his appearance, that he was the elf for his job.

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CAKEMAN, SANTA'S HEAD BAKER ELF

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Cakeman, Santa's Head Baker Elf

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Here we have Cakeman as he watches all of his cakes fall after Tubby, the official candy tasting elf, trips and falls on the shaky wooden floor of his kitchen.
Is that heart broken horror you see on his face, or does his expression just show concern for poor Tubby?
What do you think?

Fellow Woodcarvers Challenge

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Here is a challenge for all of my fellow woodcarving friends.

I'm not proud, I confess that I made a mistake typical of most beginners, as I planned the carving of this head.

Drastic measures had to be taken to fix the mistake mid-carving.

In viewing the end result, can any of you see what the mistake was and spot how the mistake was attempted to be corrected?

I want to admit right here and now that the fix did not turn out to be too subtle!

Most of you will probably spot it right away.

After I get a few opinions, I will reveal what I did in a few days.

Thanks,, diy for your guess.  No, I did intend for the head gear to look like it does to convey that the character was a baker or cook.  The mistake that I made was trying too many times to create the facial expression of the Baker.  I would try one thing and decide that that wasn't what I wanted, then try again and so on.  Finally I had carved so deeply into the head that I had carved facial details where the ears should have gone and precious little wood left to shape the back of the head.
You can see just infront of the ears I have had to inset extra wood for ears.  Not too subtle but I got the job done! (grin)
Millard